men?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Forum' started by Midnight Blue, Jul 20, 2003.

  1. evergreen

    evergreen New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2002
    Messages:
    148
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Good advice Al_Vampyre. God made woman for a reason. Men and women are different and that's how it's always going to be and that's how it should be. Find someone who attracts you more than just through physical means and commit to them.

    10 reasons Women are better than sheep.

    It is socially acceptable to have sexual relations with a woman.
    Women look good in wool.
    Women leave the room to fart.
    Women know how to make popcorn.
    Whipped cream doesn't taste good on mutton.
    Sheep won't scratch your back.
    Sheep won't drive you home if you're too drunk.
    Sheep don't care who fondles them.
    Sheep don't do threesomes.
    You can't marry a rich sheep.
     
  2. Dyre Straits

    Dyre Straits 10 Grandkids -2 Great-grandsons

    Joined:
    May 13, 2002
    Messages:
    19,685
    Likes Received:
    2,714
    Trophy Points:
    153

    And only God knows why. ;)
     
  3. evergreen

    evergreen New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2002
    Messages:
    148
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    One day, after a near eternity in the Garden of Eden, Adam calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem."

    "What’s the problem, Adam?" God replies.

    "Lord, I know you created me and have provided for me and surrounded me with this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I’m just not happy."

    "Why is that, Adam?" comes the reply from the heavens.

    "Lord, I know you created this place for me, with all this lovely food and all of the beautiful animals, but I am lonely."

    "Well Adam, in that case I have the perfect solution. I shall create a ‘woman’ for you."

    "What’s a ‘woman,’ Lord?"

    "This ‘woman’ will be the most intelligent, sensitive, caring, and beautiful creature I have ever created. She will be so intelligent that she can figure out what you want before you want it. She will be so sensitive and caring that she will know your every mood and how to make you happy. Her beauty will rival that of the heavens and earth. She will unquestioningly care for your every need and desire. She will be the perfect companion for you," replies the heavenly voice.

    "Sounds great."

    "She will be, but this is going to cost you, Adam."

    "How much will this ‘woman’ cost me Lord?" Adam replies.

    "She’ll cost you a leg, an arm, an eye, an ear, and a testicle."

    Adam ponders this for some time, with a look of deep thought and concern on his face. Finally Adam asks God, "Uh, what can I get for a rib?"
     
  4. BWX

    BWX get out and ride

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2002
    Messages:
    19,684
    Likes Received:
    63
    Trophy Points:
    73
    Here's a funny pic I stumbled on while looking for info on an old stereo receiver. I couldn't post the pic, so here's the link- Hope it works.

    http://klip5.tripod.com/sa110.htm
     
  5. Mac Daddy

    Mac Daddy New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2002
    Messages:
    7,948
    Likes Received:
    109
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Good Point;)

    (for people becoming confused with the current dialogue .. its not your browser;) )
     
  6. BWX

    BWX get out and ride

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2002
    Messages:
    19,684
    Likes Received:
    63
    Trophy Points:
    73
    That's funny, I just get to the point and say the things after the "=" - besides the ones I took out. I'm not kidding. It's worked pretty good so far.

    That's what they really want to hear anyway. Or maybe by me saying that, I get the the girls who want to just hear it like it is. Like if she start's bitchin, I don't say "honey, what's wrong?". I say, "Shut the f*ck up and quit being a bitch" - Then she yells a little, I yell back- then she shut's the f*ck up and we forget about her being such a bitch.... until the next time. Perfect.
     
  7. Shadow Lady

    Shadow Lady Avril Fan

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2003
    Messages:
    1,262
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    LOL, very nice and tru Midnight Blue ^^
     
  8. Falstaff

    Falstaff Old Codger

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2002
    Messages:
    20,553
    Likes Received:
    311
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Men...by Martin Mull

    MEN CAN STINK AND MEN CAN SWEAT.....

    AND NEVER WIPE THEIR FEET...

    AND NEVER ASK DIRECTIONS....

    AND NEVER LIFT THE SEAT.....

    Men, men, men, men
    Men, men, men,men...


    It's great to be on a ship with men and sail across the sea, oh,
    We don't know where we'll land or when, but it's great to be with men.

    'Cause men can sweat and men can stink and no one seems to care, oh,
    We'll throw the dishes in the sink and clog the drain with hair, oh!
    (And clog the drain with hair, oh!)

    Men, men, men,
    We're a ship all filled with men,
    So batten down the ladies' room, there's no one here but men!

    There's men above and men below and men down in the galley,
    There's Butch and Spike and Buzz and Biff and one guy we call Sally!
    (And one guy we call Sally!)


    Men, men, men,
    We're a ship all filled with men,
    You'll never have to lift the seat, there's no one here but men!

    We're men and friends until the end and none of us are sissies,
    At night we sleep in seperate beds and blow each other kissies!
    (And blow each other kissies!)

    Men, men, men,
    we're a ship all filled with men,
    So throw your rubbers overboard, there's no one here but men!
     
    Last edited: Jul 22, 2003

Share This Page

visited