Very short jokes

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Forum' started by Trusteft, Dec 2, 2009.

  1. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    When God made Adam and Eve, he looked upon Adam and said: "I am very pleased with myself, I have made you just right!" He then looked at Eve and frowned slightly: "You're gonna have to wear makeup."
     
  2. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    Why does Steve Jobs always wear a pullover?

    - Because shirts have too many buttons.
     
  3. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    Trust - returning home from a business trip early without phoning your wife first.
     
  4. Trusteft

    Trusteft HH's Asteroids' Dominator

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    An Irish unemployed worker immigrates to Greece.
     
  5. Takaharu

    Takaharu Unus offa, unus iuguolo

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  6. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    That one, fortunately, isn't so short. ;)
     
  7. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    UN made a worldwide survey asking people what they thought of food shortage in other parts of the world. The survey ended in a disaster:

    - in Africa, the people didn't know what "food" was;
    - in western Europe, the people didn't know what "shortage" was;
    - in eastern Europe, the people didn't know what "one's own opinion" was;
    - in America, the people didn't know what "rest of the world" was.
     
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  8. Cow_160483

    Cow_160483 HH's only cow moooooo...

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    nice one IvanV :D
     
  9. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    Two mice got into a video store and started munching on some blu rays. "How's your movie?", asked one mice. "Good", answered the other, "but the book was better."
     
  10. Neshi

    Neshi HH's cuddly Blue Bear

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    hmm.. kind of depends how you look at it.
    I think a mere 100 years in the grand scope of things is very, very short.
     
  11. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    The lesbians next door bought me a Rolex for my birthday, I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch...
     
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  12. Cow_160483

    Cow_160483 HH's only cow moooooo...

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  13. goddesss

    goddesss New Member

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    Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.
     
  14. synthesis204

    synthesis204 New Member

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    I once tried to set my password to penis.

    I got a "password not long enough" error ):
     
  15. blibbax

    blibbax nahm8

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    /facepalm
     
  16. synthesis204

    synthesis204 New Member

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    How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do?

    Enough to kill two and a half men.
     
  17. Tyrsonswood

    Tyrsonswood HH's curmudgeon

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    That was only yesterday......
     
  18. Calliers

    Calliers Side hustle: Mayor of Kenja Staff Member

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    :lol:
     
  19. Tyrsonswood

    Tyrsonswood HH's curmudgeon

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    If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.
     
  20. Takaharu

    Takaharu Unus offa, unus iuguolo

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    You've obviously never met my fiance: If you can't fix it with a hammer, get someone else to do it. If they can't fix it, get the hammer back.
     

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