Very short jokes

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Forum' started by Trusteft, Dec 2, 2009.

  1. Trusteft

    Trusteft HH's Asteroids' Dominator

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    "Pretentious? Moi?"
     
  2. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    The only b word you should call a girl is beautiful, bitches love being called beautiful.
     
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  3. jackjackduank

    jackjackduank ..xXx..

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    boy : your father must be a policeman
    girl : :confused:
    boy : because my heart is in jail with you
    girl : luv..luv..
     
  4. Neshi

    Neshi HH's cuddly Blue Bear

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    I'm kind of like that girl after the first sentence... don't get it
     
  5. blibbax

    blibbax nahm8

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    If you're chatting up a girl who responds to that line with "luv..luv..", reconsider your choice of target :p
     
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  6. jackjackduank

    jackjackduank ..xXx..

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    he's flirting her :)
    because he's heart always locked to her's :)
     
  7. blibbax

    blibbax nahm8

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    Ah, I'd always wondered what this kind of thing was about. Thanks, that's solved a lot of problems for me! :p
     
  8. Takaharu

    Takaharu Unus offa, unus iuguolo

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    I'll be back.
    I'll be Beethoven.
     
  9. Dyre Straits

    Dyre Straits 10 Grandkids -2 Great-grandsons

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    What do you call a deaf person?

    Call them anything you want; they can't hear you. ;-)
     
  10. craig5320

    craig5320 Well-Known Member

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    A guy walks into a bar... ouch.
     
  11. Tyrsonswood

    Tyrsonswood HH's curmudgeon

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    I've done that... It's not funny. :mad:
     
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  12. jackjackduank

    jackjackduank ..xXx..

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    hahaha.... nice Ty
     
  13. Takaharu

    Takaharu Unus offa, unus iuguolo

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    "My dog's got no nose."
    "How does it smell?"
    "Terrible"
     
  14. Mousey

    Mousey HH's Official Rodent

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    How do you put an elephant in the fridge?
    Open the fridge, put the elephant inside, close the fridge...

    How do you put a deer in the fridge?
    Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the deer in, close the fridge...

    A new Lion King is born, All the animals go to see except one, Why?
    The Deer, Because it's still in the fridge...

    An old lady arrives at a crocodile infested swamp she needs to cross, but doesn't have a boat, How?
    She swims across, The crocodiles are at the Lion King's birthing...
     
    Last edited: Mar 29, 2012
  15. Dyre Straits

    Dyre Straits 10 Grandkids -2 Great-grandsons

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    Q: How many lawyers does it take to roof a house?

    A: It depends on thin you slice them.

    Q: What do you have when a bunch of lawyers are parachuting out of an airplane?

    A: Skeet!
     
  16. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    A small boy asked his father: "Dad, can you explain politics to me?"
    "Well", answered the father, "it's a bit like our family: I make the money, so I'm the capitalist; your mom takes care of the house, so she is the government; our maid does all the house work so she is the working class; you are ordinary people and your baby brother is the future."
    "Ah", said the boy, "now I understand!"
    "You do?", asked the father.
    "Yes! The capitalist is screwing the working class while the government is asleep; all the while, the ordinary people are being ignored, and our future is in shit!"
     
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  17. Calliers

    Calliers Side hustle: Mayor of Kenja Staff Member

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    Hahahhahaha, good one. :rofl: +repped.
     
  18. Cow_160483

    Cow_160483 HH's only cow moooooo...

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    Nice one Ivan V am gonna copy that joke :p
     
  19. IvanV

    IvanV HH Assassin Guild Member

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    Why do Java programmers wear glasses?
    - Because they don't C#.
     
  20. Kizo

    Kizo HHs Valve fanatic

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    An iOS6 user walks into a bar ... a hotel ... a field...?
    He is not really sure...
     

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